0016. Dungeon

And yet…

On her, it looked good. Stunning, even. Maybe because the actress was just that pretty.

“Why are you staring like an idiot?”

“Unnie, I’ll trust you and follow your lead.”

“……N-no, I’m kidding! Don’t take it seriously!”

“But I don’t think my talent will be of much help.”

“Who knows, we might find some clues along the way.”

Yuna said while scanning the surroundings.

“The fastest growth happens when your talent awakens.”

A combat method utilizing onaholes…

Was she suggesting I develop something like that?

‘I have absolutely no idea how.’

For now, I decided to follow Yuna.

‘Guess my bike couldn’t come with me…’

My belongings… Thankfully, my smartphone was still there.

But it wasn’t working here.

Not ‘out of service’, it just wouldn’t turn on at all.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“You really don’t know anything, do you?”

“…Would the all-knowing A-rank Onahole Teacher care to enlighten me?”

“…Pfft. Did I hurt your pride?”

Knowing there was no malice, I fired back playfully.

Yuna seemed to be enjoying this, giggling to herself.

“In dungeons, the more complex a machine is, the easier it breaks.”

“Complex machines… That’s a vague standard.”

A smartphone definitely counts as a complex machine.

“What about guns?”

“Guns break too. Maybe not a tiny pistol, but small firearms have at least a 5% malfunction rate.”

5%…?

So, if I keep shooting, there’s a 5% chance the bullet jams and I get fucked?

‘Feels like a space with enforced rules.’

Almost like a game world.

……A game within a game?

“All you need here is a single blade. Let’s go.”

……Hah.

Otherworldly academy students really live spectacularly. Even their dialogue is extraordinary.

And here I am, a military veteran, shuddering at the thought.

‘I can’t fall behind.’

Soon, Yuna spotted a goblin settlement.

About… twenty of them?

[[Insight・Crimson] Activated]

[Goblin][D]

[Stupid demi-human monsters. The weakest among the Beast’s minions.]

‘Is that one the boss?’

[Goblin Captain][D+]

[Leader of the stupid demi-human monsters]

“I’ll take that side. You think you can handle about five on the opposite end, Sang-hyuk?”

“…….”

I’ve never tried.

But if I said I couldn’t fight these tiny monsters that barely reached my waist…

[Aww~ Should this unnie handle everything while our little Sang-hyuk sucks his thumb and waits?~]

…….

That didn’t sound too bad, honestly.

But I felt like I had to prove myself.

“I can do it.”

“If it’s too much, just buy time. I’ll be done in… maybe a minute!”

Whoa.

Yuna charged ahead first.

“Kyaaak!?”

“Kekeke!”

“Skree! Skreee!”

I wondered if drawing that much attention at once was wise, but before the goblins could react, Yuna swung her sword in a wide arc, cleaving through them.

I was stunned when I saw what looked like sword energy scattering from her blade.

‘An attack skill?’

My eyes involuntarily analyzed Yuna’s skill.

[Ambush Slash]

[C-rank Attack Skill]

[Power C / Range C / Initiative Bonus +1]

‘…I want something like that too.’

Come to think of it, I did have something that could be called an attack skill.

[Personality Excretion]

Should I test it? It’s not like these ugly monsters deserve any mercy.

“Run! Run!”

Swish!

I hurled a rock at the group of goblins trying to flank Yuna.

“Gyaaak!”

“Skree! Skreee!”

“I’ll take care of you guys.”

I delivered a cool one-liner and took my stance.

The goblins’ eyes bulged as they each drew their crude blades.

‘Huh?’

Those sharp weapons looked kinda scary…?

I took a step back, and the goblins screeched as they rushed me.

Screw it!

“Personality Excretion!!”

[Personality Excretion Activated]

Take this, the ultimate attack skill!

[Personality Excretion]

THUD!!

The goblin I kicked collapsed instantly, unable to move.

‘Oh. That was effective.’

A martial arts skill, then?

In that case, time to get aggressive!

“Personality!! Excretion!”

THWACK!!

“Excretion!!”

THUD! THUD! THUD!

I aggressively used [Personality Excretion] to take down the goblins one by one.

One-hit kills. The destructive power was insane.

At a glance, the goblins looked like they just collapsed after one hit, paralyzed and motionless.

‘Damn, I’m kinda good.’

Must be because it’s an attack skill bestowed by a goddess.

……Not sure how this relates to being an ‘Onahole Collector,’ though.

[Skill[Become an Onahole!!]Learned!]

[Skill[Onahole Touch]Learned!]

[Skill[Onahole Inventory]Learned!]

…Yuna was right.

The fastest growth happens right after talent awakening.

But all these skills are just absurd.

[Become an Onahole!!]: Transforms the target’s personality or body into an onahole. Lasts indefinitely unless dispelled.

[Onahole Touch]: Increases an onahole’s ‘happiness’ through gentle (forced) touch.

[Onahole Inventory]: A sub-inventory for infinite onahole storage. Automatic hygiene management, with holes always maintained at optimal temperature.

……Hmm.

As I stared blankly at my new onahole utility kit, Yuna, having finished cleaning up, walked over.

“Kim Sang-hyuk. Did you see? My awesome performance!”

“……Y-yeah. Saw it.”

“Learned a new skill? Wow. You really are fast. Maybe you do have talent.”

“I have talent… it’s just that my talent is being an Onahole Collector.”

“Pfft… hehe….”

The shame that once made me want to run away had now become a comfortable inside joke.

The importance of camaraderie was undeniable.

“Try using it. I’ll be your test subject.”

“That’s a disaster waiting to happen.”

Use [Become an Onahole] on you? I don’t even want to imagine the consequences.

“Then on a goblin?”

I’d hate that even more…

But since they’re disposable anyway, maybe it’s worth testing.

Just then…

Something rustled beneath the grass before rising up.

It was……

[Goblin’s Excreted Personality]

[Goblin’s Excreted Personality]

[Goblin’s Excreted Personality]

A slime… or something like it.